Marriage joins more than just you and your spouse-to-be. The bond creates a new family and your kids deserve a special place in the ceremony and reception. If you have children, take a look at the top tips for including them in this memory-making event.
Include Your Child from the Start
While the adults need to make the major decisions, your children should feel like they have a stake in the wedding planning. The degree to which your child helps depends on their age. But in general, children can help to:
- Choose the venue. Again, this major choice is up to you and your fiancé. But you can bring your child with you to possible venues. Ask them for their opinion or have them help to make a list of the pros and cons of each possibility.
- Choose a theme/colors. If you plan to have a specific theme or wedding colors, ask for your child's input (within reason). While a Disney theme or dayglo orange and pink may not find a place in the actual wedding, your child should like they can contribute ideas.
- Choose the menu. Are your children the only younger guests at the wedding? If not, ask them to help you plan a children's menu.
- Choose the activities. Will you have special children's activities during the reception? Your kids can help to plan these or offer family-friendly ideas.
Now that your child has a hand in the planning process, the time has come to move on to the wedding itself. Read on for more information on ways to include your child in the events leading up to your nuptials and the big day.
Have a Family Pre-Wedding Party
You’ll likely host plenty of events leading up to your wedding. You have an engagement party, shower, and bachelor/bachelorette bash. Even though your child may come to some of these pre-wedding parties, none of the events were specially for your children.
Add one more party to the celebration—just for your kids. If you're not sure what to plan, consider:
- A family shower. Instead of a girls-only shower, add everyone to the mix. You can choose this option in addition to your traditional shower too. But don't ask guests to bring gifts to both.
- A pre-wedding picnic. Have a backyard bash. This is an inexpensive, and easy, way to include everyone in the family.
- A kids-only party. Throw a new family party with a complete kid focus. Invite your child's friends, children in the family (such as cousins), or other children who will also attend the wedding.
Discuss your party plans with your child. They may have ideas you haven't thought of or have a specific guest list in mind.
Select a Strategy for the Wedding
After the parties are over. The time has come time to plan your child's role in the wedding. How will you include your child in the ceremony or the reception? Popular ideas include:
- Child-sized vows. Along with the vows you make to each other, your new spouse can also make vows/promises to your child.
- Special exchange. You get a ring. But what does your child get? Choose a special token of your family's love to give your child during the ceremony or at the reception.
- Add to the cake. The traditional bride and groom cake toppers don't have to apply here.
- Add your children to mix and include them in the cake décor.
- Parent-child dance. After the first couple's dance, have a special dance for you, your child, and your new spouse.
Continue to include your child in the wedding activities after the reception ends with a family-moon vacation. This can follow a traditional honeymoon or take the place of it.
Do you need a wedding venue? Contact
Chez Shari Wedding & Conference Center for more information.
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